Laws and love
Nov. 8th, 2008 01:04 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
sarasteFirst, a meme started by ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
kittydesade again.
To commemorate, in its own way, the passing of Prop 8, write slash. Not random PWP sex-slash, but loving committed relationships slash. Two people who love each other deeply and want to be together, to share their lives together, as simple as that.
Then.. I cannot for the life in me understand why laws must be put in action to prevent gay people from marrying. (I agree withvexed_wench with first cousins marrying being kinda creepy. I thought about it on my situation, it would mean my hypothetical possible child marrying my sisters baby... Meaning that my niece/nephew would marry my kid. And that just feels kinda... creepy.)
I'm not American so this law doesn't touch me. In Finland I can marry (being gay) if I wish. Though I think I'd need a girlfriend for that. XD And even here the law was very much opposed by the church. The Lutheran and Orthodox churches are national churches by constitution and their opposition is the reason why gay people can't have a church wedding, there had been much recent hassle about priests blessing a gay union after a civil ceremony. With it being okay for buildings and stuff I cannot see why it should be bad for people.O_o
I don't have a religion so the church thing doesn't affect me. What does (in being gay) is the certain stigma I still feel is attached to being homosexual. Homosexuality was a crime until 1971, a mental illness until 1981 and we had a 'anti-suggestion law' regarding homosexuality that was only abolished in 1999. It meant that you couldn't encourage anyone to be gay, meaning that all gay pride rallies were basically a crime and you couldn't broadcast fact programmes about gays on TV. The law was never really enforced, in the early 1990's some activists actually gave themselves in for having broken the law in an attempt to bring to light the insanity of the law but they weren't prosecuted and it took years to finally get rid of the law.
Anyway... I had a point somewhere in this ranty post. Being gay, or whatever, has taken me a long time to accept. I'm now 23 and I'm still second guessing myself on that score. There are society's double standards that make me question myself. Lesbian porn for men. The lack of non-straight people in the streets. The way society has shown me, drilled the idea into my head that finding a man is the thing I need to do as a young woman. Saw a family friend, a middle-aged school teacher the other day and she asked about my life. I told I had applied for a single. She asked me if it was because I had found some guy. Okay, it was annoying for her to assume that I need someone (as she implied that 'I'll find someone') and also that that someone would be a guy. What freaked me most is that it didn't sting as much as it used to, even last year! *sigh* I'm I turning back to guys again?! The heck!
That aside... I think that, in ten years or so, as I look my life forward, I'm living somewhere which isn't University housing. I have loads of books, maybe Nekku has a kitty friend. I have a job (hopefully) and I'm content. And what is there with me, sometimes not always, in that picture is a girl, a woman, not a guy. Softness and feminitiy. And if I get to have that... I might just wanna marry. And am glad I can have a legal binding. (Children I will not talk about in this post since that would lead to a lenghty rant about the new artificial insemination and sperm doning laws around here...)
*big hugs to all*
I'm hopings things at large would change for the better and people wouldn't be judged and treated differently due to sexual preference, race, sex or spiritual leanings. Maybe someday? <3
kittydesade again.To commemorate, in its own way, the passing of Prop 8, write slash. Not random PWP sex-slash, but loving committed relationships slash. Two people who love each other deeply and want to be together, to share their lives together, as simple as that.
Then.. I cannot for the life in me understand why laws must be put in action to prevent gay people from marrying. (I agree with
vexed_wench with first cousins marrying being kinda creepy. I thought about it on my situation, it would mean my hypothetical possible child marrying my sisters baby... Meaning that my niece/nephew would marry my kid. And that just feels kinda... creepy.) I'm not American so this law doesn't touch me. In Finland I can marry (being gay) if I wish. Though I think I'd need a girlfriend for that. XD And even here the law was very much opposed by the church. The Lutheran and Orthodox churches are national churches by constitution and their opposition is the reason why gay people can't have a church wedding, there had been much recent hassle about priests blessing a gay union after a civil ceremony. With it being okay for buildings and stuff I cannot see why it should be bad for people.O_o
I don't have a religion so the church thing doesn't affect me. What does (in being gay) is the certain stigma I still feel is attached to being homosexual. Homosexuality was a crime until 1971, a mental illness until 1981 and we had a 'anti-suggestion law' regarding homosexuality that was only abolished in 1999. It meant that you couldn't encourage anyone to be gay, meaning that all gay pride rallies were basically a crime and you couldn't broadcast fact programmes about gays on TV. The law was never really enforced, in the early 1990's some activists actually gave themselves in for having broken the law in an attempt to bring to light the insanity of the law but they weren't prosecuted and it took years to finally get rid of the law.
Anyway... I had a point somewhere in this ranty post. Being gay, or whatever, has taken me a long time to accept. I'm now 23 and I'm still second guessing myself on that score. There are society's double standards that make me question myself. Lesbian porn for men. The lack of non-straight people in the streets. The way society has shown me, drilled the idea into my head that finding a man is the thing I need to do as a young woman. Saw a family friend, a middle-aged school teacher the other day and she asked about my life. I told I had applied for a single. She asked me if it was because I had found some guy. Okay, it was annoying for her to assume that I need someone (as she implied that 'I'll find someone') and also that that someone would be a guy. What freaked me most is that it didn't sting as much as it used to, even last year! *sigh* I'm I turning back to guys again?! The heck!
That aside... I think that, in ten years or so, as I look my life forward, I'm living somewhere which isn't University housing. I have loads of books, maybe Nekku has a kitty friend. I have a job (hopefully) and I'm content. And what is there with me, sometimes not always, in that picture is a girl, a woman, not a guy. Softness and feminitiy. And if I get to have that... I might just wanna marry. And am glad I can have a legal binding. (Children I will not talk about in this post since that would lead to a lenghty rant about the new artificial insemination and sperm doning laws around here...)
*big hugs to all*
I'm hopings things at large would change for the better and people wouldn't be judged and treated differently due to sexual preference, race, sex or spiritual leanings. Maybe someday? <3
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2008-11-08 02:42 pm (UTC)I'm angry, I'm sad, I'm hurt, I'm outraged, and more importantly, I have lost faith in my country. That we continue to discriminate based on ANYTHING, whether it be sex, race, religion, or preference, makes me so incredibly...sad.
That we feel we have the right to legislate how a person can express something as unique and individual as Love, is to me, beyond comprehension.
I can only pray that, like the law that made it illegal for women and non-white men to vote, this potential new constitutional amendment will, (if it passes) be repealed at some point, and our country can come out of the dark ages, to stand proud and tall with the many countries of the western world who have gay marriage. Canada, the UK, Finland, Switzerland, The Netherlands... all of these countries have legalized gay marriage and have some how managed not to have a break down in the moral fabric of their societies... why America would think they would be any different is beyond me.
I could go on... but I'll save you all the drama.
/rant
<3
PP
no subject
Date: 2008-11-08 10:25 pm (UTC)I feel with you. And at times like this I feel ashamed of myself that I'm not more politically active regarding gay rights issues. For even while we have rights in Finland there are still people with a certain attitude. My roomies mum is kinda negative towards gay people, or so I've heard. Also, a friend of mine says she is quite liberal and doesn't mind me being a lesbian (leaning a bit towards being bi, but at the moment not so much) but has said to me that she thinks that to women cannot live together and be in a relationship as they would, quote 'get on each others nerves and be too similar to work together'. And this from a girl I've been in love with and confessed to. *siiiigh* My life's so messed up!
I will keep hoping for better times for LBGT people in the US. Why must there always be close-minded people? *siigh*
(ps. Rant all you want. I don't mind.) *biiiig hugs*
no subject
Date: 2008-11-08 10:10 pm (UTC)I know some of those couple do work out , Hell I went to Jr high with a couple that got married when they were like 15 and last I heard they were still married.
Just makes wonder is all.
no subject
Date: 2008-11-08 10:26 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-11-08 10:29 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-11-08 10:31 pm (UTC)http://www.coolnurse.com/marriage_laws.htm